Merry and Bright

Okay, I stole that title from Express' Christmas campaign. But it seems fitting right now, just past the Christmas rush. Our family used to be so with it, getting our tree and presents up really early in the season. But as the years go by and everyone's new nuclear families expand (there will be 12 of us this year and 13 next), we come to the finish line later and later. I did get the tree early to surprise Mom about two weeks ago, but I was so late on getting her gift, it arrived Christmas Eve afternoon!! (Thanks Amazon ;) ) Over all Christmas managed to be a lovely day, and was filled with food and family and pajamas.

One tired little niece, Ella, fell asleep munching on some cereal in the afternoon.

Owen and me at my aunt's Christmas party that evening. He's awfully serious in pictures.

(I'll stick a family photo in when my sisters get them to me as well)

On the 23rd I had my high school NESA class over for a little reunion. We managed ten of the nineteen on Facebook (I know, what is the world coming to?) and had a blast! It was so nice to catch up and see what everyone is doing now. Mom commented that its really cool to see how grown up everyone is, all the different paths we've taken. Michael brought a beautiful camera and tripod and we took a few pictures.

From left: Carlyn, Michael, Rachel, Leonard, Paige, Marsha, Grayson, Andres, Ashley, and me. We've got filmmakers, actors, cheesemongers, international relations, future doctors and therapists all in this bunch alone.

We are still, after all the years, a rather silly bunch.

So I've been home five weeks tomorrow and it's been so relaxing and lovely. I've seen lots of people, slept without alarms, worked on my scrapbook (dork alert), sat around a few fires, and been on tons of lunch dates. I feel so blessed to have had such a long holiday, to be surrounded by people who love me. But I did "man up" four days ago and buy my ticket back to the Big Apple. I leave the 30th, just in time for New Years Eve in Manhattan! After my initial anxiety and refusal to press "purchase", I am very excited to go. I know in my heart the next step is in New York and beyond that, God only knows.

As I continue to coach myself in the art of taking things one day at a time I am so hopeful about what is next. While I do feel less and less sure of who I am, I know that being open to new experiences, open to letting life take me on the ride, will be less stressful and more fulfilling in the end. I've talked to a lot of my friends in this similar situation- having just graduated and feeling very lost in the world, unsure of their own footing- and I just tell them what I tell myself everyday: "I am young. Hardly anyone knows who they are or what they want when they are young. It is ok to search. It is ok to fail. It is ok to continually change my mind."

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year out there!